Clarity: More than mirrors

“Ogres have layers.” This was the metaphor Shrek used when he was explaining to Donkey that there was more to Ogres than the stereotypes implied. He was making the point, that regardless of how others saw him, that he was more than they said he was. He had clarity about who he was and why he existed. It’s common for us to become unclear about who we are, because of the expectation of others.

When you look in a mirror, you get an instant picture of what you look like. A mirror gives you clarity about what you need to change. For instance, when you are getting ready to go out you would get dressed, and then look in the mirror. You would do this to assess if you were completely happy with your going out attire. If you were not happy, you would make changes. If you were still in doubt about how you looked, you would ask someone else. You would have clarity about how you looked, and how you want others to see you.

 “Looking in the mirror isn’t a true reflection of who you are”

Although looking in the mirror provides a good reflection of what we look like, it doesn’t reveal the other layers we possess. We use another mirror for that. The approval of what others think about us. This can be beneficial, or it can be harmful. It can obliterate our self-worth, or it can add value through affirmation and support of who we are or who we could be. The latter is where we need to abide.

What others think of us is important, but it needs to be with the perspective of, getting clarity about who we are and where we contribute the most value.

There are five key things that we need to consider when getting clarity about ourselves:

·       Understand our strengths. What are we good at? What do we enjoy? And where do we see ourselves adding the most value?

·       Know our beliefs. Do they align with our strengths and support us going forward and support our growth?

·       Be clear about our values. How do these align with our strengths and are they congruent to who we are?

·       Our purpose. Why do we exist?

·       Self-assessment. Who is speaking into our lives truthfully and revealing our blind spots?

 Once you have clarity about yourself, you help others see you and where your value is. Clarity helps people assess you better and enables them to ask the right sort of questions about where you can add the most value.

My 5 Learnings:

·       Others see me as I see and project myself

·       It’s important to have trusted advisers that help me, see what I can’t see about myself

·       Physical appearance is not who I really am

·       I need to be clear about where I add value

·       To have clarity about myself I need to be self-aware

Clarity comes from us being able to get a 360-degree perspective of ourselves. We can realise this by taking responsibility for being intentional and honest in our own self-reflection and the application of trusted feedback.

My 3 Questions for you:

·       What are you believing about yourself? Is it what others are saying about you? And is it true?

·       Are you clear about what your strengths, values, beliefs, and purpose is?

·       Who do you trust to ask for honest feedback about yourself?

 “The more of me I be, the clearer I can see.” ― Rachel Andrews

If you need help in getting clarity about who you are, or if you have questions, please talk to me. I would be happy to help and chat with you.

Remember daily to, “Find value in your influence”